Baby Michael Anthony Matthews



       February 23, 2000 - May 19, 2001














You can visit Michael's Memorial Site by going to 





Window Cord Safety

A recent study published by the Journal of the American Medical Association [2002] reports that "since 1981 nearly 360 children have strangled to death in window cord accidents around the home." If the figures are correct it means that nearly one child is strangling in window cords every two weeks. Almost all of these deaths (93 percent) involve children three years old and under.

Strangulation deaths from window cords happen most often when children are in places their parents think are safe: in a crib or in a child's bedroom. In 85 percent of the documented cases, parents were at home at the time of the incident. Horribly, the deaths are silent -- the children can't call out for help.

There are two common ways children strangle in these cords. Infants in cribs near windows get tangled in the looped cords while sleeping or playing; and toddlers, trying to look out a window, climb on furniture, lose their footing, and get caught in the window cords.

The mortality rate from window cords makes them among the greatest strangulation threats to children three years old and younger. Eight-six percent of the window coverings involved in the incidents are venetian blinds or mini-blinds. Another nine percent are venetian-type vertical blinds. Other products that present a strangulation hazard to children in the home and have been redesigned include strings on pacifiers, recliner chairs, accordion-style baby gate, and electric garage doors.

The Window Covering Safety Council agreed to eliminate the loops in future production of window cords and to provide free safety tassels for consumers. Production of safer cords began in 1995. In addition, and at CPSC's urging, the industry recently agreed to a voluntary standard that eliminates all loops on miniblind cords and requires the use of a tensioning device on the continuous loop cords that are used primarily in vertical blinds. The industry expects all production to meet the new standard by September, 1997.

Risks to children can be reduced if parents and grandparents cut the loops of window cords, put on safety tassels, and move furniture away from blind cords. These simple precautions can prevent a nightmare. You can get safety tassels and tie downs by calling the Window Covering Safety Council toll free at 1-800-506-4636. For safety information on window cords, call the CPSC Hotline at 1-800-638-2772.









  We were so happy when you came to live with us on February 23, 2000, Little Mike.  It was a day of joy for us.  Uncle Jim and Grandma watched you come into the world -- you were beautiful, and such a treasure to us.  The doctor said, "It's a girl!"  And Uncle Jim said, "Hgh, I really don't know much about medical stuff, but I think it's a boy...."  And sure enough, there you were, our little boy treasure to love and hold, if only for awhile.......   WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!!!!


 May we find some kind of peace in our lives -- we miss you so much.  We know you are with Jesus, looking down on us, and loving us still -- yet, we miss you so much......


We await the time until we are with you again -- may we do and accomplish all the things in life that would make you proud of us.  You live on in our hearts and always will until we are united again.....  






   The expression of grief varies considerably among different cultural groups. Yet there are stages of grief that occur whenever there is a loss.

Shock: experiences of shortness of breath, tightness in the throat, a need to sigh, muscular limpness, and loss of appetite occur in the first hours after a loss is experienced. As the shock abates, the physical symptoms lose their intensity and we begin to absorb reality. If there is a persistent wish during grief, it is that the loss could be reversed.

Denial: allows the slow assimilation of the loss. At first the thought is that the report must be wrong. There is often the feeling that a mistake has been made or that the person will walk through the door any minute. As time passes and preparation for change or for the funeral begins, reality is faced.

Bargaining and self-blame: requires a greater level of acknowledgment that the loss has occurred, but resistance lingers to the extent that we attempt to make deals to reverse fate. There is a litany of "I should have's," such as, "I should have paid more attention, said something positive, been more patient."

Anger and anxiety: are emotional signals that our psychological equilibrium is out of sync. A loss stirs feelings of rejection and powerlessness that lead to feeling anxious. In the first hours or days, feeling restless and unable to sleep is common. Anger at the loss, the one who is gone, the people who made the decision, all are normal reactions to loss. Anger often causes the most consternation as it is an emotion with which many are uncomfortable. Anger is a healthy indication that we are beginning to accept the facts.

Acceptance: occurs with time. The realization sets in that the situation is not going to be the same as before, or that the person is not going to return and there is nothing that could have been done to change the outcome. There will be moments when a return to any or all of the stages occurs, yet accepting the loss allows us to move forward in the grief process.

   No two people are alike, therefore no two people will experience grief the same way. Each grief experience has unique features or dimensions.  Certain dimensions are hightened and intensified in each grieving experience.

   The first part of grief is shock.  It is real and yet at the same time seems not real.  When grief hits the mind goes into shock  The mind although will protect us from going crazy.  Sometimes we feel as if we are in a whirl, thousands of questions fly through our minds, but they are there and gone before we can get the answers.  Listening and concentrating become almost impossible.  Sometimes we ask questions and have another in mind before the first one is answered.  With only brief glimpses of reality the thought that we will no longer see our loved one again flashes by, but does not stay long.  We cry, but it does not seem real.  Things will settle and eventually some of our questions can be answered before we ask another.  The reality of this will not fly by, it will come and land on our chest like an enormous weight.

   THERE IS NO SCHEDULE FOR YOUR GRIEF.  Do not let anyone schedule your grief for you, you'll get there in your own time.  No one can tell you how to do your grief work.  There are no experts.  You are the expert in your grief.  Let it flow as you are ready.

   About all the questions, it won't hurt if they go unanswered, and many questions will not have an answer.  The hurt will not go away by having all the questions answered.  The lack of answers did not cause the hurt and the presence of answers will not make the hurt stop.  It is ok to ask questions, it is normal to ask them.  Some examples are: Will I survive? Will I ever be well again? When will the pain go away? When will it stop getting worse?  Will I be able to stand the pain? Am I going crazy? How can I ever enjoy life again? Will I ever be able to laugh again? What things will change, or remain the same now?  Why?  Why?  Why?  These and others are very normal questions asked or wondered by the grieving person.

   People can try to put a time limit on grief.  Some say two years, some one, some less.  Give yourself time to walk through the whole process.  Do not think that you are a weak person or you lack faith if it takes a long time.  Getting permission from others is difficult, giving it to ourselves is even harder.  Don't let anyone "it is time" you.  Don't "it is time " yourself.  How long??  As long as it takes.....



 Baby Michael Anthony Matthews

February 23, 2000 - May 19, 2001

We will always love you, Baby Mike

Grandma and Grandpa McGee and All Your Family



Cheyenne Rose Kaiser

May 25th, 2001 - June 12th, 2002

My beloved twin daughter was taken to heaven on June 12th 2002.
She was so precious and so perfect.  I miss her smell, her skin,her laugh and her cry.
I have mediated upon this verse since losing my daughter.
1 chronicals 16:11 Seek the Lord and his strength, seek his face continually.
Matt & Linda and Seth and Maddie
I cannot wait to see the glory that waits for me in heaven.
Mariah Glynn

                 Born: July 01,2000      She Died: July 01, 20000



Mariah was never ment to be here long but the Lord has used her death to help many families. In her memory an Organization gives to babies and children all over America.
Brian and Mary Glynn and brothers and sister
We love you sweet Mariah Belle
Zachary Thomas May
February 22, 2004 -- February 22, 2004
My sweetong baby angel -- Zachary Thomas May, blessed my life while inside me, and for the brief moment that he was on the earth.  I love him and miss him very much.  He is God's little angel now and now God is truly blessed with Zachary.
Mommy and Daddy     Grandma and Grandpa
I will see you when I get to heaven, help God as much as you can.  Love, Mommy



Create a beautiful memorial site for your loved one!! 


MEMORY  OF .  com





Processing Sudden Death

by Glen Davidson , MD

There are stages of grieving which are part of the natural response to a traffic death or dehabilitating injury of a loved one. These stages are similar to the feelings experienced by a victim/survivor of a traumatic incident. These stages are marked by feelings which may seem confusing or even "crazy" both to the grieving person(s) and to those around them. There is no absolute time limit for any of the stages. The duration of each stage can be affected by individual situations and circumstances.

Grief and/or loss is so painful that sometimes efforts are made to deny or push the feelings out of mind. Grieving "work" involves allowing both fond and tragic memories to come to mind, experiencing and sorting out the grief (loss) from the rage (helplessness), and eventually replacing the helpless rage with some type of positive action for the future.

Does grieving ever end? There is a basis of reality in the expressions, "It will take time" and "Time heals all wounds". The pain of grief does lessen or change with time, the open wound heals, and the person is changed by the experience.

For those victim's and their loved ones who must face and cope with permanent disfiguration disability, or loss of prior levels of mental and/or physical ability, it may seem as though the "open wound" or "pain" will never heal and, in fact, becomes all consuming and controlling of their future. It is for these victims that an understanding of the grieving/loss process is vitally important. To understand these feelings and their effect on the dynamics of the victim's relationship with others, is to gain control over the process, rather than to be controlled and even destroyed by it. Reaching out for help from both friends and professionals is critically important and often the most difficult for these victims. The stages of grieving are most often described as a cycle including Feelings and Behaviours.

1.SHOCK AND NUMBNESS (High level during first 2 weeks)

Feelings may include: disbelief, denial, anger, guilt. 

Behaviours may include: crying, searching, sighing, physical symptoms, loss of appetite, sleep disturbance, muscle weakness, limited concentration, inability to make decisions, emotional outburst(s), impeded functioning.

2.SEARCHING AND YEARNING (High level from 2 weeks to 4 months)

Feelings may include: despair, apathy, depression, anger, guilt, hopelessness, self-doubt, very sensitive to stimuli.

Behaviours may include: restlessness, impatience, poor memory and lack of concentration, social isolation, crying, anger, loss of energy, testing what is real.

Comments: In crisis, we become open to a wider spectrum of stimuli in our environment. We are susceptible to over-reading stimuli. We need to talk things out in order to refocus our interpretations. We cannot get through the mourning process alone. It is important to reach out during the first four months when motivation is high.

3.DISORIENTATION (Peaks at 4-7 months)

Feelings may include: depression, guilt, disorganization, feeling that grieving is a disease

Behaviours may include: low compliance with orders of physician, resistance to reaching out or sharing with others, urge to try to live as if nothing has happened, restlessness, irritability.

Comments: It is at this stage that an awareness of reality and it's consequences is very high. A weight loss or gain of more than 10 pounds may occur. The victim must beware of trying to live as if nothing has happened or giving into the urge to flee the setting in which the loss occurred, for these are temporary solutions to a permanent situation.

4.REORGANIZATION (Takes 18-24 months to stabilize after major change)

Feelings may include: sense of release, no longer obsessed by loss, renewed hope and optimism.

Behaviours may include: renewed energy, stable sleeping and eating habits, relief from physical symptoms, better judgment making, increased interest in goals for the future.

Comments: All four phases peak on anniversary days or your "significant" days. We mourn loss, both through death and major joyous changes (graduation, wedding, new job). Depression is nature's way of getting you to simmer down.

There is general agreement among the experts on acute post-loss grief that these phases are not discrete and sequential. They do not follow each other in any prescribed order. They tend, rather, to overlap and to proceed in a jagged pattern of a forward thrust, then retreat to an earlier phase, then a forward movement again. No two people will react alike, and the same person will not react in the same way to every loss. However, each phase must be experienced to a peak of intensity before it can be resolved. Normal grief is healthy and should, under favorable environmental conditions, lead not only to recovery, but also to growth and healthy change. The grieving process can be visualized as a cycle specifically concerned with grieving or loss. This "cycle" generally follows a "crisis" or unexpected event. The following diagrams provide illustrations of the Grief/Loss Process and precipitating Crisis Experience.


The following thoughts on coping are offered by Reverend Kenneth Czillinger of Cincinnati, Ohio, who for the past 10 years has been involved in working with the dying and grieving, and more recently has participated in forming support groups for parents who have lost children through death.

1.Generally it takes 18-24 months just to stabilize after the death of a family member. It can take much longer when the death was a violent one. Recognize the length of mourning process. Beware of developing unreal expectations of yourself.

2.Your worst times usually are not at the moment a tragic event takes place. Then you are in a state of shock or numbness. Often you slide "into the pits" 4-7 months after the event. Strangely, when you're in the pits and tempted to despair, this may be the time when most people expect you to be over your loss.

3.When people ask you how you're doing, don't always say, "Fine." Let some people know how terrible you feel.

4.Talking with a true friend or with others who have been there and survived can be very helpful. Those who have been there speak your language. Only they can really say, "I know; I understand." You are not alone.

5.Often depression is a cover for anger. Learn to uncork your bottle and find appropriate ways to release your bottled-up anger. What you're going through seems so unfair and unjust.

6.Take time to lament, to experience being a victim. It may be necessary to spend some time feeling sorry for yourself. "Pity parties" sometimes are necessary and can be therapeutic.

7.It's all right to cry, to question, to be weak. Beware of allowing yourself to be "put on a pedestal" by others who tell you what an inspiration you are because of your strength and your ability to cope so well. If they only knew!

8.Remember you may be a rookie at the experience you're going through. This is probably the first tragic death you've coped with. You're new at this, and you don't know what to do or how to act. You need help.

9.Reach out and try to help others in some small ways at least. This little step forward may help prevent you from dwelling on yourself.

10.Many times of crisis ultimately can become times of opportunity. Mysteriously your faith in yourself, in others, in God can be deepened through crisis. Seek out persons who can serve as symbols of hope for you.


    Web Page:



At: 'Women of Ministry / Women of Faith'   INTERNATIIOAL 





Rev. Lin McGee       

111 Marshall St.   Winsted, CT   06098       Phone 860-379-1298



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Please visit me on my other websites:

Precious Stars

Faith and Life Ministries


On the websites of those I am affiliated with:

Patriot Guard Riders

Connecticut Patriot Guard Riders 

Missing In America Project

VA Voluntary Service

Military Ministry

Christian Military Fellowship 

Post #296 VFW Ladies Auxiliary

Marine Corps League Auxiliary

American Soldier Memorial Project

  No Soldier Left Behind  Memorial


On my husband's websites:

JESUS My Lord and Savior Church  

Men Walking With God 



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